That song.

Was working out in the gym this morning when the radio played Eternal Flame by The Bangles. It's been ages since I last heard that song, and an ex-girlfriend in junior college used to call it "our song"-- we'd met at the end-of-orientation camp dance, and I'd mustered enough courage to go up to her and asked for a dance to that same song, and after that night, it was the start of a on-off adolescent relationship.

 

When you're barely 18 years old and in to your first relationship, you can probably expect things to be rocky, I think. Granted, it was romantic at times, but most times, there were squabbles over the pettiest of things; and I sometimes wonder if I'd become adverse to getting too serious and too committed in relationships because of that one experience.

 

The most memorable thing, I think, about that particular relationship was how I'd spent close to 2 months doing up a scrapbook filled with love poems, songs, pictures and sketches I drew myself for her birthday, and that was while we were preparing for the GCE "A" Level examinations. We'd been in a relationship over 2 years by then, and it all ended in the second year of my national service, about a month before my officer's commissioning parade. We got to invite family and loved ones to that parade, and while my parents were there, in place of the ex, I got a distant cousin to go along whom I sort of hooked up with on a rebound following the breakup.

 

Odd thing is that during those 2-3 years when I dated JC Ex, we never had sex-- we did engage in some really heavy petting sessions ("she let me finger her pussy!"), but my first sexual encounter wasn't with her, but with an older woman, an adjunct lecturer in school 5 years older than I was, and we had sex in one of the squash courts one evening when she was supposed to tutor me for the A level exams. I suppose that's where I started getting interested in married and available MILFs.

 

Anyway, I bumped into JC Ex one time some years back, and seriously, I was surprised to see the pretty prom queen so many guys tried to date had become chubby over the years, and nothing much to say about her grooming. Not trying to be nasty, but there you have it. She's married to an equally porky dude who kept eyeballing me from head to toe in that brief encounter, and for a second or two, an evil thought had crossed my mind and I wondered if I should say something along the lines of "Don't worry dude, she's all yours."

 

But I left it at that; say hello, did the how-are-yous, and left. So much for Eternal Flame.

 

***

La Femme is back from her trip, and after I'd picked her from the airport, and while she was in the shower, I texted Liz to tell her there might be some changes to our schedule; I get the feeling Liz wasn't really pleased, but she said no problems, cause she would be dating the other guy as well. Not sure if it was jealousy, but I did feel a tinge of uneasiness when she texted that.

 

La Femme had been packed off to London for almost a month by her company, and I was amused by how she'd run up to me (literally) soon as she saw me at the airport and again, literally jumped on me for a big hug and kisses like a small girl. When she started unpacking at home, I saw she'd been busy shopping much as she was working: a new Hermes Birkin that many women would envy, 2 new pairs of Manolo Blahniks, a dress from Red Valentino, and as usual, presents for me: a scarf from Burberry (not that I really needed one in this stupid tropical heat), and some shirts from Ted Baker. She's an expensive woman, really, but whatever rocks her world.

 

...which leads me to wonder why is it that women go all the way halfway across the globe to get stuff they could easily get back home in Singapore; I mean, the price differences aren't really that fantastic, and you factor in the marginal costs involved in the travelling and such, you may as well be patient and wait for another season then walk into the boutique at MBS or ION; and seeing how the shops here probably know her, she could probably get them to order and bring in particular pieces she fancied off the website-- and she's done it before too, so she would know.

 

With La Femme, it's almost like a totally different world we live in: rich daddy's girl who went to the top schools, have the looks and the brains, and is on the fast track career-wise, and in a hurry to get ahead of the pack; in terms of personality, she's a little like me, only I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth. In her mind, she is the sort who despises women like Paris Hilton, but probably thinks she's a Carrie Bradshaw; needless to say, she's expecting her man to be like a Big, and it's no wonder her relationship track record is so similar to Carrie's.

 

Lifestyle-wise, with her, it's all about material comfort and indulgence; and honestly, I see nothing wrong in the way we live our lives-- we're both indulging in things we can afford to, even though to some, it may come across as extravagant.

 

Over the years, I've come to appreciate the relationship we've had over the years, and it's always nice to have a woman who can give a good debate on things especially in a business sense, though I have to admit there are times when I wish I'd gone for a simpler woman who would shut up to let her man win his side of the argument.

 

I sometimes find it hard to define the kind of relationship I'm in with her, and honestly, I've given up explaining to my parents and hers about just what sort of "arrangement" we're in: to both sets of parents, they're wondering why the hell we don't just get married and have kids in the way people normally do, especially given we've been living together for so long. La Femme lists her status on Facebook as "married", but in actual fact, we're not: we've broken up on and off, she's moved in and moved out a couple of times, we're in love, then we're not; and in the end we just agreed she should stop watching Sex and the City because she's becoming too much of a Carrie.

 

But at least in the past 5 years, we've reached some sort of stability, probably because of her frequent work trips to Europe and New York. Which is probably just as well, because I realize relationships-wise, I don't like to be too tied down and suffocated with her being around me all the time.

 

And of course, the sex is great between us. I guess that's one thing people fail to realize, that a healthy sexual relationship is what cements two people together, and when all's said and done, we're just that primal. Some people ask if she's aware of me sleeping with other women, and if I think she's sleeping with other guys; I think it's come to a stage where, gauging from both our sex drives, the answers are clear, even though I suspect I'm probably more guilty of doing it more often than she does.

 

Somehow when La Femme's around, I devote more of my time for her, and she becomes a priority. Hence, Liz, Yam, the MILF and any other women I'd taken a fancy to would have to wait. It's sort of like a rule I'd set and gotten used to.

 

And it sure was nice to snuggle up next to her naked body last night after all this while.